"No...I've Got This."

I think I have said these words too many times. It occurred to me how much I was saying this when a friend was with me and responded (before I said anything) to someone who asked me if I needed help, "No, she's got it." Wait...why did she answer for me?

"It's simple" said my friend. "You always say that. You could be carrying 400 pounds of something, dragging your ass, and you would not accept help. It's something you always say". I do?

I realized she was right...and obviously she was making fun of me, I mean we wouldn't be good friends if she didn't...but I started wondering why I was saying these words even if was dragging my ass trying to carry something or getting something done. Why do any of us say no to help? To not look like we can't handle something? Because we would seem weak? Or is it so we would be bothering someone to help us? Who knows the exact answer each and every time. But this I know for sure: I need to start saying 'YES' more!

I carry a backpack that, if weighed, might be over 25 pounds on any given day. On top of that I carry a purse, a lunch bag and if needed, an umbrella. In each bag I typically need one, maybe two items. Yet, I carry face wipes, 18 shades of lipstick, SHOUT stain wipes, vitamins (in case I forget to take one at home), a notebook, calendar, often two laptops, (don't ask), charging cords, several pens (in case I lose one), hairspray that doesn't really hold any of my hairs in place, 3 tweezers (necessary...no discussion needed), flashlight, car keys, phone, phone charger, plates and other assorted utensils for eating, full-size food items (I run late most mornings and grab the entire containers), coffee mug, 3 inhalers, and an assortment of gum and gum wrappers. I probably missed something...but you get the drift.

My point in sharing all of this is things get heavy. Just like in life. So when I answer I got this...am I letting people think I don't need help? I bet I am. Because that is all wrong. I often need help. But the more important anecdotal question is: Do I ever ask for help? Do any of us? And what is it about asking for help that keeps us from doing that? And why when I want to help I expect people to let me?

I feel like my bags being overloaded with, oftentimes unnecessary items, is a great analogy of how I carry unnecessary thoughts, worries, hardships around with me each day. Huh....

So for the record: I can always use help. I don't always 'Got this'. And furthermore, I would want to help you, so why not allow you to help me? In fact, if you know me well, you know that lately I could use the help. So there. And, "No. I DON'T got this." And...thank you for your help.