“No really, can you hear that? It sounds like a constant ringing and maybe a little like I am under water”, I said to my Dr. during last visit. I hear it all the time. And when I try to go to sleep at night and it is super quiet, I feel like a steam engine lives inside my brain. It is so loud!
Which leads me to the other issue to discuss: not being able to hear any conversations at the restaurants or bars anymore. I go out and about and I am hoping we can sit in the area seeming for the older set, which is not by the bar area, in the high traffic area, by the kitchen or even the area without lots of ceiling tiles. I prefer sitting outside without the music blasting. Which is pretty limiting since I live in Minnesota. I get excited when there is not music playing. Maybe too excited. I am trying to communicate by reading lips now. However, certain words look like certain other words and I am usually mistaken. Not to mention how weird the conversations become when I am ‘reading’ lips. Which really I am not, but whatever. Sheesh…
Back to ‘Do you hear what I hear?’ I mean, Do you? I am certain I am losing some of my hearing and my ears are slowly being filled with steam from the steam engine in my head. I ask the question due to noticing other friends of a ‘certain age’ also seem to be reading lips. And I hope I am not alone. Strange new conversations I am having. Both people looking at the other’s lips while nodding as if we understand all that is being said. So when did this all happen? How did I become a non-professional lip reader? And when did my hearing change?
I remember walking around with my friend as she tried her new hearing aides. I was thinking how awful it must be to not hear as well anymore. To lose that sense of knowing what is being said in conversations. Now, I find many of us are nodding our heads as others speak…not looking at other’s eyes but lips and I recognize myself in them.
And I know…I am not alone.